Just remember: NO DANCING!

There's an old joke about a Baptist minister and his wife working together in their church.  As the day went on, they were having a great time together and things started to get a bit amorous.  The pastor was kissing his wife and things started to get hot and heavy.  He pressed her against the wall after removing some clothes started to make love to her standing up.  She was quite worried about getting caught by someone but he assured her it was OK because they were married.  She then said, "I know, but I just hope they don't think we're dancing".

Rev. Ed Young from Dallas is getting a lot of press this week because he came out with a challenge to his parishioners: have sex with your spouse for seven days straight.  What a great fucking idea! (no pun intended).    Read it here.

I think pastors all over the country, all over the world should follow Rev. Young's idea.  If there is a problem in the church, it's not enough Christians are having nasty, dirty, sweaty sex.  Maybe if they were having more, they wouldn't have to worry so much about what their neighbor is doing and who they are having sex with.

I am going to follow the good Rev's advice and encourage the little woman to do the nasty every night this week.  "We're doing it for the Lord", I'll tell her.  I'll tell her I'll probably be in a better mood and I'll want to turn off the TV and help with the dishes.  I'll want to buy her things, massage her feet and write her poetry.  

Since we're going to be getting at it almost constantly I've been looking up some new positions. I think we're going to try some cowgirl, butterfly, scissors, doggy, missionary (of course) and maybe a just experiment. Here are some ideas.

However, no matter what my wife does or promises to do I already told her that under NO circumstances will there be any dancing.  That would be wrong.

Love is stronger than death.

I don't know what it is about homosexuals that scare fundamentalists so much.  According to Tony Perkins, head of the Family Resource Council, the MOST important issue on the ballot this week is Proposition 8 in California. It's more important than the Presidential election, he says.      Read it here.

Now, I don't what he's been doing but after the last four years but I think the Presidential election is pretty damn important.  George W. Bush has been a disaster for American and religious hacks like Perkins wholeheartedly supported him in 2000 and 2004.  Now that it looks like they'll lose their White House guest passes, they figure the Presidential election is not really that big of a deal.

I have to wonder if any of the thousands of families who lost love ones serving this country in Iraq and Afghanistan think a couple of gay caballeros shacking up and calling it marriage is the most important thing on the ballot.  I wonder if the hundreds of thousands of people put out of work this year think gay marriage is the most important thing they will voting on.  Or how about those millions of people who do not have any form of health insurance?  Do they really care about what whether homosexuals call their unions "civil union" or "marriage"?  Because that's all this issue is about: what we call it.  Both sides of this issue are wrong and it's a waste of taxpayer time and money.  It's also distracting from things that really matter.

There are life and death issues that we need to deal with on a National level and which direction this country goes in depends on this election.  But Tony Perkins, James Dobson and the rest of those who deal in religious fear mongering think that the most important thing we have to deal with is what we call it when two people of the same sex decide to love one another. It's pathetic.  

Perhaps these guys don't know that you're never going to change people through the law.  Read Romans.

You change people through love.  They need to love the gays just a little bit more.  Although if they did that, it's possible that they might just like it a little too much.  Maybe that's what's scaring them.

Sodom and Gomorrah set to return to Earth

The latest polls show California Proposition 8 is trailing in the polls and that gay marriage is set to take over the populace in California. Floods, firestorms, earthquakes, pestilence and riots are soon to overtake the Golden (shower) State. So in other words, life will go on as normal.

Honestly, I think Prop. 8 will win though due to the Rosie Effect. People do not want to appear bigoted but once in the voting booth (or would that be closet?) they are going to tell gays to bend over and take it.

Just wait and see.

Marriage between one man and one woman? Is that Biblical?

There's a Proposition on the ballot in California to define marriage as between a man and a woman.  I guess because the clause is in the singular it's supposed to mean ONE man and ONE woman.  A lot of Christian groups are supporting this amendment (and even non-Christian ones like the Mormons) mainly because they hate fags.  

However, I don't see a lot of basis in the Bible for defining marriage as between ONE man and ONE woman.  Usually, marriage in the Bible is between ONE man and several women but I don't see many Christian groups clamoring for this type of marriage amendment.  Personally, I support it.  There are not a lot of good Christian men out there. It's a shame that they are taken and their selfish wives do not want to share.  I think there should be an amendment to amend this.

Some people might say that because Paul says that a man cannot serve as a deacon who has more than one wife that it rules out polygamy in the New Testament.  I do not agree.  Because a man's duty is to his wife, a man with more than one just won't have the time or the energy to serve in the position of deacon.  Especially now, in the age of Viagra.

I don't really care too much if gays get married.  They are going to hell anyway, according to my judgmental friends.  Of course, according to the Bible so are the sexually immoral (there goes the GOP ticket and their kids), thieves, the greedy, slanderers and swindlers (there go the GOP supporters) as well as drunkards, idolaters and others.  Being gay is just one of a host of sins that send you to hell but I don't think about it as much as some other Christians because I guess I'm not tempted by it like they are.  

Having more than one wife?  Now, that's a different story.  

Bring back Biblical marriage.  

I've got a lot of love to give.